Learning to Embrace the Online World—With Boundaries

My Personal Strategy

Last time I wrote, I shared some candid thoughts about social media and a bit of nostalgia for the quieter, simpler days of the internet. I’ve spent some time reflecting since then, and I’ve come to realize something important: if I want to continue using the online world as a tool to minister to other women, connect with like-minded families, and help provide for my own, then I need to adapt.

That doesn’t mean I have to compromise my values or get swept up in the whirlwind of trends. It means learning to use these tools wisely, in a way that brings life instead of draining it.

Letting Go of the Old Instagram

One of the first changes I’ve had to make is letting go of the old-school Instagram feed. I loved the days of simple square photos and snippets of life. I even asked my followers what they preferred, and—surprise!—many of them shared that they, too, missed the old ways.

But I realized something: I was mostly asking women in a similar stage and mindset to mine. And while I cherish those connections, that style simply doesn’t work anymore if I want to use my platform more intentionally and sustainably.

Instagram has shifted. That means more Reels, more carousels, and more text-based posts. But to preserve a bit of that older, authentic style, I’m committing to a monthly “photo dump”—just simple, personal moments from our life. And if we have a special event or milestone, I’ll probably do it more often. It’s a way to stay real in the midst of all the polish.

Keeping Substack Like a Blog

Here on Substack, I plan to keep things much more “old internet.” Writing and photos. Quiet reflections and real thoughts. Just like a blog used to be—and still can be.

I’m also shifting more of my focus to YouTube. It allows me to go deeper in a way that Instagram just doesn’t. Longform video and voice feels like a better format for certain things I want to say and share, and I can tell it’s helpful for others too. There’s something beautiful about having these tools available to us in this generation—and I want to use them in a way that breathes life rather than steals it.

To help me stay grounded, I’ve put myself on a fairly strict schedule using an app called Unpluq. It’s not the cheapest, but it’s worth every penny to me. It essentially turns my smartphone into a “dumb phone,” while allowing access to the essentials—like maps and podcasts

Here’s how it looks:

• 8 AM to 1 PM — Fully unplugged. My phone is basically off during this time.

• 1 PM to 6 PM — I open things up to post, create, and respond. This is also when I’m working around the home, so I do a sort of back-and-forth: 30 minutes of housework, 30 minutes of content work. It’s a rhythm that works well and feels balanced.

• 6 PM to 10 PM — Fully unplugged again for family time.

• 10 PM to Midnight — Quiet time. Sometimes I check messages or wrap up some work if my husband is busy or winding down.

And yes, I’m a night owl. I’ve tried the early morning route, but my kids seem to have a radar for when I’m up. So I’ve learned to lean into those evening hours when the house is calm.

Lastly, I fully unplug on the Lord’s Day, from sunrise to sunset. Occasionally I’ll check messages around 10 PM, but only if something feels truly pressing.

Staying Anchored in Purpose

One of the best ways I’ve found to stay intentional is to remember why I’m here in the first place. I’ve even written myself a mini mission statement—a reminder of my goals and focus online. I’ll share more of that in a future post.

Knowing my purpose helps shape how I post, who I interact with, and what I pour time into. It also helps me make better decisions about the kinds of accounts I follow. I want to be more intentional there, too. Right now, I follow quite a few people, and honestly—I don’t always know what they believe or stand for. Sometimes I follow someone after one or two encouraging reels, but I want to be more discerning. That kind of sifting will take time, but I’m hoping to chip away at it during appointments or moments of downtime.

Let’s Talk About It

That’s where I’m at for now. It’s a work in progress, but I’m feeling more clarity than I’ve had in a while.

I’d love to hear from you—how are you approaching social media and the online world in this season? What boundaries help you? What rhythms keep it from becoming a burden? How are you using it to serve the Lord and bless your family?

Let’s keep learning together.

With grace,

— Stacey

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